real. gross. stuff.

December 14, 2009 by amywhere

Friday night at my old high school, I volunteered the concession stand for a basketball game. Fun! I was in the concession stand making popcorn and hot dogs. On the popcorn burner thing, I burnt the top of my hand, right on a vein. It hurt when it happened, and that hurt didn’t go away for the whole night. Now I have a mark, it’s right over the vein and I’m hoping I didn’t cauterize it.

I wanted to sneak off and explore the hallways, see my old locker and maybe have a flashback to the nightmare everyone has of getting lost and can’t finding a classroom. But that was impossible because the same security guard was there, at the basketball game, that was there when I went to high school, like eight years ago. And he is a big ol mean lookin’ man.

And this isn’t the first time I volunteered at a high school event. High school kids LOVE their candy. And also, high school kids are, (not all of them, thank goodness) way too sexually charged. Here comes my rant. It’s disgusting. These are children, and thanks to the media whorestorms everywhere, they have literally rapped our kids of living kid lives. Kid lives, you may ask? I mean spending their time with friends, being outdoors, playing in the woods and making forts. Learning about nature, trying to volunteer their time instead of slutting it out in a teeny bopper nightclub or sending sexts and naked pictures of gross baby teen parts that aren’t even legal yet. I’m sorry, but you have your whole life to wear low cut tops. Why not concentrate on what school is all about, education. All these idiots these days are about status, sex and labels. It’s the nasty girls who ruin it for all the good girls.

October 30, 2009 by amywhere

A Little Rant About The Other Day
Yesterday I took a severe beating from grumpy customers. Unfortunately, our front and side doors were unlocked especially early that frosty morning, due to Mr. Antsy Anxiousness Salesman. A customer came in at 7:54am (we open at 8:30) and demanded his car be appraised.

SIR, we aren’t even open yet, and your salesman, Merlin, doesn’t come in until noon today, and, we don’t appraise your vehicle first.

The process goes in which you select a vehicle you are interested in, we go from there. Well, he bolted, not after being huffy puffy and making few snarky under-his-breath remarks just piercing enough that I could hear, twenty feet away.. “Aren’t even OPEN yet? Kidding me?”

Then, crazy local news anchor lady comes in, waiting for her crew to show up so they can do a radio ad piece for the Honda Fit. This was at 8:30am…Her “crew” is either lost or experiencing technical difficulties, she threw herself into a lunatic loco session on her cell, broadcasting her obvious “I-can’t-believe-they-can’t-find-this-place-and-be-on-time” rage. Shes now known as the even crazier local news anchor lady.

Cut to 9:40am. Snobby walking guest saunters in. I state my usual, “Hello! May I help you find someone?”

“I’m not looking for someone. I’m looking for someTHING. That 99 Oldsmobile you had in the paper last week?”

RAAAAAAR!

Alright customers, I am just the secretary. Let me rant a few lines here? I help you find your SALESPERSON, or A salesperson. I do not care about the history of your vehicle searching life, honestly. Or your life at all. I’m here to make money. You don’t care, though. I am the ears that reluctantly hear your ramblings about why your looking at the 99 Oldsmobile and not the 08 Accord, why your trade in smells like dead rotten bodies or why you don’t like Bob, that old bald salesman. You expect me to baby-sit your infantile kids, print out fifty billion coloring pages from the internet, give away all my pink, purple, orange and green sharpie highlighters and risk possibly losing them because we don’ t have crayons, when, I already have twenty five salesMEN to baby-sit who fight like children, squabble more drama than the high school cheerleading squad, blab more about sports, finance, cars, than they spit swear and smoke.

In the meantime, when I’m not car faxing, babysitting, certifying or typing in a car deal, I struggle with not viciously jump attacking guests when they sarcastically say, “My, don’t you look busy.” Or, “Playing solitaire?”

Really, Chad’s office corner?…..REALLY?

October 27, 2009 by amywhere

I crashed this 3-wheeler into Chad’s office corner, and broke off one of the lights that was attached to the wheel. I was backing up if that even matters. It was all the fun while it lasted, but the crash ruined all future {and past} fun I had with the scooter and I won’t even look at it now. It’s like I broke up with a guy. A few people in the showroom saw me do it, and probably everyone heard it too. I feel such a range of emotions; guilty, embarrassed, laughables. Anyway, I checked on it and I guess it is fixed, but I think they hid it from me because they really think I’m going to get back on it. Really.

SCOOTER

BROKE SCOOTER

i’m so gangster my grills are gum rappers

October 23, 2009 by amywhere

cold as northern winds

in december mornings

winter comes too soon

may my guide be the shining moon

and my path

the ocean

out these dreams

quell my passion

i will sail home to you

Skull n Crossbones

PIRATE OF THE SEA

ahoy! i’re a pirate!

this ear ship ain’t mine!

neither nor thare treasure!

ARRRRR! my hand arrr a hook!

thare shark he took!

my legs a peg!

that sharks dead!

better watch out for me!

or i’ll plank yar to sea!

fortune_cookies

Got a fortune cookie from a friend who ordered Chinese the other day. My fortune said, “You will soon come into a fortune.”  Hmm. OK. Thats specific for a cookie of fortune. Forgive me for being slightly over analytical, but I’m not sure exactly what they mean…. monetary fortune? Am I right? Not any old love fortune, luck fortune or remote control fortune. Also unclear is ‘when’ soon is suggesting. Tomorrow? In a half an hour? Fifty years?

COFFEEEE

October 23, 2009 by amywhere

[coffee poster.bmp]

I have a relationship with coffee that will last the rest of my life, it’s a morning thing, an afternoon thing, it’s even a four pm thing when I work until eight.

It started a few times at work, when I’d be so tired that I’d suffer through a small cup of the ickycheap coffee we have at work. For a pick up, nothing works and tastes as well as coffee

Then I upgraded to going to Coffee Hound, which is the little coffee hut place near my house and pretty much right on the way to work. I get a 20 ounce vanilla latte with four shots of expresso and whipped cream. I didn’t realize how much I’d been going there until they started to know what I wanted before I ordered it. I’m getting the fat tummys from it too.


trust. it’s a fragile thing, once earned, it affords us freedom but once lost it can be impossible to recover. the truth on trust is we never know who we can trust, those we are close to can betray us and total strangers can come to our rescue. in the end, most people decide to trust only THEMSELVES.

October 20, 2009 by amywhere

CHICKEN

Last night, Mike grilled and barbecued a whole chicken. YUM, wild rice on the side.

Tonight, I should have leftovers, which include a leg or thigh, and some other part of the chicken I really don’t want. I only like the real white meat parts.  I may end up having oodles of noodles.

I really don’t have much to say. Could say a ton of stuff but it’s not worthy to post it to the world. I’m just happy that I can post this while I’m at work. I have a half hour left and then tomorrow is my day off. Looking forward too it.

the store, potatoes, cooking n stuff

October 15, 2009 by amywhere

My mom and I go to the store every week, I help her carry the groceries (because we get a sheetload) and she usually gets me a couple of meals too. And I’m talking great meals, meals I’m going to learn how to purchase and put together myself.

Yesterday I got those yummy little round sirloin bacon wrapped steaks, two huge honkin potatoes, a bunch of fresh green beans, and a cherry pie. It was awesome. I can cook a potato so well, but I’m scared that I’m eating too much butter. We buy the real butter, and I put it on everything. Two huge chunks on one side of the potato. Two more huge chunks of butter on the other side. 

Anyway, my point is I’m learning how to shop well for meals. All you need is a meat, a vegtable, a POTATO and a drink. It’s something I’ve really been enjoying, is cooking/baking or whatever you call it. Actually, I really just like the eating the result part.

July 30, 2009 by amywhere

I am obsessed with fishing

crazy dreams

June 23, 2009 by amywhere

midnight_dreams

NO TITLE DREAM:

Mike and I went to this upstairs part of a house and there were about 15 people who lived there. I guess my brain made them to be traveling salespeople AND helper people. I suppose they helped out at carnivals and lunches and people hired them to help with their events.  They were a crazy bunch- one guy was shirtless and he was sawing something in front of the living room window.

One guy was doing drugs. One girl kept yelling and I have come to the conclusion that she was a major beeyotch. We sat on the couch, very uncomfortably for me-

Then, I found a little blonde haired boy who had a tatoo that said, “God Bless Me” on his torso and I felt so bad for this boy, he was all dirty and he didn’t know how to clean himself.

I then was outside waiting for Mike in the passenger seat of the car and some lady walked up to my window and locked the door for me. I was mad at Mike for taking me to this house!

SURI CRUISE DREAM:

I woke up in my dream, and I was lying in bed, and Suri Cruise comes in my room and smiles real big, she says, “Look at my teeth!” And I just was kind of like hmmm okay.

完全

June 22, 2009 by amywhere

Perfect days only exsist once in a blue moon, and I had one yesterday. When your timing is right and everything blends together smoothly, and things actually happen it makes for a well put day!

I started my day at four am, and got an iced vanilla latte. At six, I was in my dads driveway to catch him in case they had a busy day. And they did have a busy day and my timing was perfect because they were about to leave for a boat cruise. I was able to give him his fathers day card and then we all ate blueberry pancakes. (HELLO??? YUM!!!)   So I thought that it was really nice I was able to spend that time with my dad before they left for two full days.

Then, I had some chores to do around my mom’s house. Vaccum, clean bathroom, take garbage out. I enjoy helping out for two reasons: it gives me responsibility and teaches me to take care of my own place, and I just like to help out my mom, she deserves it.

After that, I was able to finally get all cleaned up and ready for the steak dinner that Mike’s parents were gracially preparing. Usually I don’t care but I didn’t want to look like too much of a slob.

Finally, my day ended with a four hour nap then waking up for a half hour and going to bed for the night. It was a good day.

fathers day card3

fathers day card2